My boyfriend and I will be making two years on January 21 (Next week) Since the beginning of our relationship he cheated on me and kept on until about 7 or 8 months into the relationship and I chose to forgive him, I then cheated on him several times. I know I am not in love with him and I am pretty sure he is not in love with me. I find myself wishing or thinking of being single, I also find myself interested in other guys. How do I let go and why is it so hard for me to let go? — Anonymous
Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to let go of someone you’ve been in a relationship with. Sometimes people hang on to each other because they’re stuck in a certain behavior pattern, they’re dependent on each other or they feel they won’t have another opportunity to find love.
The key to interrupting this cycle is to choose what’s best for you. You might want to take some time to think about what kind of relationship you want and how you want to be treated. Think in terms of what you need to live a positive life and treat yourself well. You might even consider spending some time alone to find out who you are and celebrate the wonderful things about you. It’s like taking a deep breath after you’ve been underwater for a long time.
In a healthy relationship, the people involved value each other, behave in positive ways and really want to be with each other. It’s really difficult to keep a relationship going if one of the people doesn’t want to be in it. Take some time to think about what you want to do and then talk with him calmly and kindly. Be brief and to the point and listen to him.
Remember that you get to decide what kind of relationship you want and who you want to be with. Don’t forget to take care of yourself along the way as well. Take care.
The Relationship Situation
How do I move on and become a stronger person? I want to resist being in relationships and searching out for love, because I need to become a stronger, more confident person. I need to work on myself but it seems that I constantly need to find love in order to be happy. My most concrete, sought out for dream is to someday be married to the love of my life. But none of my relationships are going to work out without me becoming a better me. I just don’t know how to stay away from the want and how to get one step closer to becoming the me I really want to be.
The Relationship Advice
Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s natural to want to have a romantic relationship. The key is to have a meaningful and healthy relationship with yourself first. One of the important lessons in life is that we can’t find happiness from the outside, it has to come from within. That means that you have a lot of power to move your life in any direction you want and be the happiest you possible.
You might find it helpful to focus on yourself for a while instead of looking for someone. Do things you love, plan your future, study, think, meditate, hang out with friends or make new ones. Find out who you are and what brings you joy without being in a romantic relationship. Celebrate how wonderful you are.
The more you know yourself the truer your path will be in life. You’ll also find that you’ll be doing things where you’ll meet people who really value the type of person you are. Remember that you deserve to create your own happiness first and then invite people to share it with you. Take care.
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