Relationship Advice Blog

Thank you for sharing your situation. One of the best things you can do when dealing with a controlling or manipulative relationship is to put as much distance between you and the other person as possible. That means having no contact in any form because you realize that controlling and manipulative behavior can lead to a dangerous situation, including domestic violence.

The key is to treat yourself well and learn from your experience. Take some time to think about what you would do differently in the future so you don’t find yourself in a similar situation. If you’d like, give yourself the gift of seeing a therapist to get some ideas on how to avoid situations like these. It’s also beneficial to let go of the need to follow-up or worry about what he’s doing on Facebook or anywhere else. That’s part of the thinking and behavior that leads to finding yourself in a controlling relationship.

Please consider letting go completely and moving on with your life. Surround yourself with people you trust and keep them informed about what’s going on. Ask for help if you need it and make sure you’re safe. Remember that you deserve to move your life in a positive direction and focus your energy on people who treat you well. You’re worth it. Take care.

Thank you for sharing your situation. You can’t do anything about what someone else thinks or does in a relationship but you can decide what you want to do. You might take some time to think about what his behavior means, as in: What does it mean when someone behaves the way he’s behaving?

The idea is to decide how you want to be treated in a relationship and how you can keep your life moving in a positive direction. An important lesson in life is to pay attention to what people say and do and decide if it’s acceptable to you. You might consider letting go for a while and doing things you love to do without a significant other. Build yourself up and discover how great you are. If he decides to come around, fine; if not, then you get to focus your energy elsewhere.

Remember that you deserve to be with someone who treats you well and wants to spend time with you. You’re that important. Take care.

Thank you for sharing your situation. In a healthy relationship, both people work hard to make sure they and the other person behave in positive ways. Perhaps you might do some thinking about what you need in a relationship and talk calmly and kindly with him. The idea is to decide what you want and how you want to be treated and then have some friendly conversations to help you both be on the same page. Make sure to listen to him so you can learn about his perspective.

After you talk a few times you’ll be able to decide what’s best for you and what you want to do next. It’s also beneficial to pay close attention to how he’s behaved in the past because it’s likely to be how he behaves in the future. Remember that you both deserve to be with someone who treats you wonderfully and meets your needs. Take care.

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to go through a break up in a relationship. One beneficial thing you can do is make sure that you treat yourself well and help yourself heal. Perhaps you might take some time to think about what you love doing in life and what you can do to build yourself up without a significant other. Think about what worked and what didn’t in your relationship as well as what you might do differently in the future.

You can’t do anything about what he’s thinking and feeling but you can make sure that you celebrate how great you are and keep moving your life in a positive direction. Consider talking and hanging out with trusted people and meeting new and interesting individuals. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who appreciates how great you are, treats you well and wants to spend time with you. You’re that important. Take care.

Thank you for sharing your situation. You might find it helpful to ask yourself some questions about the relationship in order to clarify what you want to do. For example:

• What are the positives about the relationship, what are the negatives and what would I do differently in the future?
• What kind of relationship do I want?
• What kind of person do I want to be with?
• What behaviors are important to me in a relationship?
• What am I doing to take care of myself and move my life in a positive direction?
• What questions do I have for him?
• What do I really want to do? 

Do some careful thinking and, eventually, you’ll decide what’s best for you. The key is to treat yourself well and move your life in a positive direction. If you’d like, you can talk with him calmly and kindly and listen to what he has to say. It’s also OK to be friends if that’s what you want to do.

Remember that you both deserve to be in a relationship with someone who likes the real you and wants to spend time with you. Take care.

Relationship Advice Blog

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to go through a break up. A lot of people find it difficult to deal with conflict in a relationship. When something goes wrong, they explode rather than talking about things.

In a healthy relationship, both people work hard to communicate with the other person. You can both do this by practicing an important communication skill, listening. You can’t do anything to change his mind but you can offer to listen to what he has to say. If he decides to talk with you, you might find it helpful to suggest the following exercise:

• One person talks for up to five minutes about something important to him or her.
• The other person listens without interrupting or reacting negatively.
• Switch sides.
• Repeat this exercise three times daily for as long as it takes for each of you to listen to the other without getting in an argument.

The key to being able to deal with difficult issues in a relationship is for both people to be able to set aside their own stuff and listen to the other person. You both have points of view that are important and deserve attention. You can give it to each other by listening.

Try this approach if he’s willing to do it and, after plenty of practice, you’ll both be communicating without fighting. Remember that you both deserve to talk about important issues in any relationship without getting into a conflict. Take care.

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to go through a break up but it can also be an opportunity to reflect and heal. It’s important for both people in a relationship to be as healthy as possible so they can help themselves and each other grow and enjoy life. You might think about taking some time to take care of yourself exclusively without worrying about a significant other.

Consider giving yourself the gift of seeing a therapist so you can discover how great you are and learn skills to cope with depression. They may even suggest other beneficial resources. Celebrate who you are as well. Do things you love, hang out with other interesting people, plan your future, study, exercise and find out who you are as a person.

The stronger and healthier you get, the more likely you’ll be to attract wonderful people into your life. Once you’ve taken some time to heal yourself you’ll also have a new perspective on your current relationship situation as well as future ones. Remember that you’re an important person and you deserve to take care of yourself first and then invite amazing people into your life. Take care.