I've been with my boyfriend for two years. I love him & we're the best together. I recently met a guy who's very handsome, cute & charming. He has a girlfriend of four years. We've been flirting a lot via text & we see each other once a week in our 3 hr lecture & a few times outside of class. I can tell that he's into me, I'm into him, and there is a noticeable amount of sexual tension between us. I want to hook up with him, but I'm not willing to let go of my boyfriend for just that. Advice? — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s always a good idea to try to date people who are fully available and able to commit to you. It’s also beneficial to pay attention to how people behave right now because that’s likely how they will act in the future.

You get to choose what kind of relationship you want and how you behave. Perhaps you might consider that positives and negatives of anything you might want to do and how it might affect you and the people around you. The key in life is to behave in ways that help you move your life in a positive direction and treat yourself and others well. Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where both people are completely honest and there for each other. Take care.

Relationship Advice Blog



A few years ago the love of my life ended up with another woman because of an age gap, I felt I was too young and needed something way less serious and he was at the point where he was ready to settle down. Recently I started talking to him again and I'm falling in love with him all over. The problem is that he's married but I have every reason to believe he feels the same. Do I continue talking to him and potentially end an unhappy marriage or stop and move on? — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s important to be with someone who is completely available and who can devote all his energy and attention to you. You get to decide what you do in any relationship and you might find it helpful to ask yourself a couple of questions to clarify what you want to do, such as:

  • What kind of relationship do I want?
  • What have I done in the past that’s worked, what hasn’t and what would I do differently in the future?
  • What do I know about my history with this person and their past behavior?
  • What is the likely future effect of any behavior I choose today?
  • What can I do to make sure I’m behaving in the most positive way possible?

Take some time to think carefully about questions like these. The idea is to behave in ways that help you live a positive life rather than finding yourself in a situation that may cause you grief.

Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship with someone who is able to commit to you and doesn’t come with extra baggage. Take care.

Relationship Advice Blog



i've been friends with this guy since we're classmates in college. he's been with the same girl ever since and when summer's almost over we became closer as friends. we started hanging out as what friends do nothing beyond that but as time passes by i started to like him. i tried to avoid him but it's hard because i don't want to ruin our friendship. what do i do? and it's also hard when he tells me he misses me. — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard when you like someone and the relationship isn’t what you would like it to be. An important lesson in life is that it’s a good idea to have a relationship with someone who is fully available and able to spend time with you exclusively.

One positive thing you can do in a situation like this is to continue to build yourself up and be a wonderful person. Do things you love and hang out with other interesting people. Live a life that you’re proud of and that helps you show the world how great you are. As you live a fulfilling life, you’ll meet people who appreciate someone like you and want to date you.

It’s difficult to try to create a relationship when there are obstacles present at the very beginning. A more positive route is to find someone who is completely available and is a good fit for you. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who can focus exclusively on you. You’re worth it. Take care. 



i've been seeing this guy recently and we've considered being in a relationship but, a girl that he had a history with (but never made it official as she was embarassed by him) has now admitted to loving him.. a few weeks before she was telling me to get together with him but now shes saying she loves him and cries whenever she sees us together! i suggested we should do what makes us happy but he doesn't want to hurt her feelings and won't be in a relationship with me.. what should i/we do?! :( — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to be in a relationship when the person you’re with isn’t completely available or someone else is involved in some way. You might find it helpful to talk with the people involved in a calm and kind way. Ask them questions and figure out what they are thinking. Listen to them and tell them what you think as well. Keep it brief and friendly.

The more you know about what each of them thinks the easier it will be for you to determine your next step. You can’t do anything about how they behave but you can decide what’s best for you. Keep in mind that it’s always beneficial to be with someone who is completely there for you and able to commit to you. You’re worth it. Take care.



Is it bad for an 18 year old girl, to go out with a 15 year old boy? He is very mature for his age and he asked me out but I don't know what I should say. Is a three year age difference too big? — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s always a good idea for an adult to have a relationship with another adult. That doesn’t mean that the underage person isn’t nice or mature it’s just that you can find yourself in a great deal of difficulties if something goes wrong. Take some time to think about how your decisions today might affect your life tomorrow.

Consider what’s best for you and what decisions will help you take care of yourself. Keep in mind that it can get complicated very quickly when someone underage goes out with an adult. Perhaps you might think of ways you can have a relationship with someone who doesn’t put you in that position and who is fully (and legally) available to date you. Take care.



Hi there. Well to start off, I think i'm in love with my friend. I've had a crush on him since sophomore year of hs, now we're freshmen in college. We share a lot of interests and we're always laughing and messing around when we're with friends. But the thing is, he has a girlfriend. I feel really stupid most of the time because he really cares about his girlfriend and I doubt he gives a shit about me. this may be cliche, but i'd wait for him, but i might just end up broken in the end. — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to like someone who is unavailable. It’s always more beneficial to find a person who is fully available when you’re trying to start a romantic relationship because they can focus their attention on you and there’s no one else in the picture.

You might want to think about what you can do to make sure you treat yourself well and move your life in a positive direction. Think about what kind of decisions you might make today that would help you live a great life. For example: You might consider continuing the friendship but also being open to meeting new people and hanging out with them.

It also helps to live the best life you can and celebrate who you are. Do things you love and keep working on being the healthiest and happiest you possible and you’ll attract people who are genuinely interested in you and are available to date you.

You get to decide what to do and what will help you live a happy life. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who is there for you and is available to have a romantic relationship with you. Take care.



I dated the same guy for 2 years. About a month after we broke up he started dating a new girl. This was 10 months ago, & while they've been dating he's been texting me saying he still loves me & he wants to have sex with me again. I told him many times to stop contacting me & to leave me alone, because the more he talks to me, the harder it is to be over him. I miss him, and I think a part of me will always love him. I want him to break up with his girlfriend & be with me but do i say anything? — Anonymous

Thank you for sharing your situation. It’s hard to go through a break up and it’s normal to wonder what you want to do. You get to decide what kind of relationship you want and how you want to be treated. It’s always a good idea to look at what’s happened in the past because it’s likely to be what happens in the future. Pay close attention to how he’s behaving now and what it might mean. For example: What does it mean when someone is going out with a person and texting another?

You might want to take some time to think about what you want to do and ask yourself a few questions such as:

  • What can I do to make sure I take care of myself and move my life in a positive direction?
  • What worked in my relationship and what didn’t? How did each affect me? 
  • What limits and boundaries am I setting?
  • What am I doing to figure out who I am and live a great life?
  • What am I doing to build myself up that doesn’t involve him?
  • What do I know about myself and how I deal with loss?

Think about questions like these for a while and you’ll figure out what you want to do. The key is to behave in ways that help you live a positive life. Keep in mind that it’s beneficial to try to have a relationship with someone who is fully available. You deserve to be in a relationship with someone who is committed to you and treats you wonderfully. Take care.